parce-que
je ne sais pas
...aimer...
jeudi, septembre 30
tut mir leid...
tut mir leid :(
ich habe Pech!!
ich denke ich bin krank... innen :(
you know what
i just hate it
and when i speak the word HATE i really do mean it
and i just can't express how i HATE it
but you just have to believe that i goes to the limit!
what's is you asked?
que-es que ce?
simple
it's the **** TPSU
okay so i may not HATE it
everyone HAS TO LOVE it
and oh don't forget
everyone HAS to put it at the top of the list
great! just GREAT!
warum?
hah
now here's where it gets ****
so it was said that the rehearsals are for monday and tuesday
they are the exact day when i have my french lesson
which mean
i was FORCED to change my course days
i was never agree to that
but since i think i HAVE TO give my word and HAVE TO done what i said
so i did change my course days
tuesday and friday it is
first
i hate my friday to be my course day
because it's my day to take my leisure which i don't take every day thank you very much!
and i hate my thursday to be book-plused!
geez! i got to bring a ton of books and i have to bring more books for that french lesson!
and i DO love my monday and tuesday
and i don't like people FORCE me on my schedule
that's one
next in line is that I MIGHT NOT GO TO THAT DREAMLAND OF ENGLAND
i am going to be graduated next year
and if i go next year then i won't have the certificate here
plus
my dad doesn't want to spend his money on it
well he said i could go for my college year
and he thinks that it will be best if i really can get scholarship
which i can only get if i have the average score more than 8
and that is not easy
and i'm telling you it's not easy at all
it gives me certain kind of pressure
not that my dad gave me
but it's from me myself
it just scares me most that i'm not good enough at anything
that i'll just be a woman of unknowledgement
i got swept up in the morning with the trash
AND HELL IT SCARES ME SO!
you know what
this uncertainties of fortune and future is driving me mad
who knows what will i be in the next 5 years
will i be a successful student?
will i be an ideal college student?
or will i be a desperate girl who cant go to any college?
or will i still be a spinster or some sort?
or will i be rejected from choir auditions?
IT'S DRIVING ME MAD!!!
AND I CAN'T SEEM TO STOP GASPING FOR EVERTHING JUST TO GET ME OUT OF IT!!
oh help me help me help me
i am just frustrated that i don't know what i'm going to be?
am i going to be safe and sound?
am i going to live a good life?
or would i end up on the street?
a girl has got to eat
yes
a girl has got to eat
and diamonds are a girl's best friend
*what?!*
anyway
i am just so frantic
all my life has been hectic
and i am so nervous about my future
all i can do is hope
that good fortune is ahead...
just hope..
just a hope...
enseignez-moi à aimer
10:38:00 PM
